Waiting
by Another Me
Summary: Epilogue for "Standoff." Cole, Frankie and Allie are in the hospital, waiting for news on Westlake.


This is just a little story, an epilogue for "Standoff." Of coarse I don't own Viper and it's main characters, but everybody knows that.  
  
Waiting  
  
I notice the guys immediately. Not that this is very difficult, Frankie is pacing up and down the whole hallway so it is hard to miss him. Cole has taken a seat and stares at the floor. He doesn't have his usual air of confidence right now.  
  
'Hey guys, I brought you some coffee.'  
  
Cole looks up at me. His eyes reflect his feelings of anger and fear. I know he blames himself for what happened to Cameron. I could tell him it is not his fault, but I don't think he'll listen.  
  
He won't open up to me anyway. Cole and I can work together very well, I consider him a friend, but we are not that close. He is the closest to Westlake, although I don't think he realized this before today.  
  
I hand him his coffee. He takes it from me, but he doesn't drink. He just stares into the carton, his thoughts somewhere else. Probably in the OR.  
  
Frankie gratefully takes his drink from me. He's glad he can do something, even although it is just drinking coffee. 'Thanks Allie.'  
  
He looks at me and than back in the direction of the OR the doctors are operating on our partner right now. 'Do you have any idea what they are doing right now?'  
  
I could tell him some details, but he wouldn't understand it anyway. So I just say the basic. 'Removing the bullet fragments and repairing the damage, I suppose.'  
  
'She'll live, right?'  
  
The question just hangs in the air, unanswered. It is the question which occupies the minds of all three of us. And like the two guys, I don't know the answer. We had her stabilized, but during the long ride to Metro and the surgery that could easily have changed.  
  
But somehow I am convinced she will live. Cameron Westlake is a tough girl, she can live through this. And she has to. If she dies, it will be devastating for the team. Cole isn't easy with new partners, Cam knows all about that, Frankie would be depressed for at least six months and I.well, I don't want to be the only girl on the team.  
  
Cole suddenly gets up and walks to the exit, leaving me and Frankie. He spills coffee on his clothes. He doesn't even notice.  
  
Frankie looks at me, an asking look on his face. He is obviously worried about Cole and wants to follow him. I am worried too, Cole is far gone now, but stopping him will do no good at all. Besides, I want to stay here to wait for news on Cam.  
  
'Let him go. He needs to be alone.'  
  
*  
  
'Thanks Allie.'  
  
I gratefully take the coffee from her. She is apparently still able to think about such things as coffee. I just wait, doing nothing useful, and Cole..well I think he is not capable of doing anything right now. He looks exhausted to me.  
  
We had a rough day, and that's a real understatement. We had almost died today, all four of us. It was really close, too close for me actually. I'm a mechanic, not a navy seal or something like that. But I survived, we survived. Only Westlake has been shot.  
  
Only Westlake has been shot.  
  
Like it is nothing. I cringe at my own thought. How can I think something like that!  
  
I check the clock which hangs on the wall. They are operating for more than an hour right now. Why is it taking those surgeons so long? What the hell are they doing? Maybe Allie knows.  
  
'Do you have any idea what they are doing right now?'  
  
'Removing the bullet fragments and repairing the damage, I suppose.'  
  
That's an answer even I could think of. I don't say this though. I am not in the mood to carry on one of our useless discussions. I have other things on my mind.  
  
The question which is going through my mind the whole time since she got shot. Whether she'll survive.  
  
'She'll live, right?'  
  
I can't believe I actually spoke it out loud. It is a stupid question. One which Allie can't answer, even although she knows so much about (medical) science.  
  
Cole gets up and walks to the door. Did my question irritate him?  
  
I look at Allie. Should I apologize to Cole?  
  
'Let him go,' she says. 'He needs to be alone.'  
  
Like usual.  
  
*  
  
Why didn't she just listen to me?  
  
If she had listened, this wouldn't have happened. Deep inside I know this is not completely true. If she hadn't helped out, I, Frankie or Allie would have been hit. Or all three of us.  
  
I also haven't the right to blame her. I am pretty sure I would have done the same thing. Not helping out would feel like letting your partner down. Especially if it had gone wrong.  
  
I should have known this, foreseen this. I should have told her to cover me from there, than she might have stayed put. This mess is my fault, at least partially.  
  
'She'll live, right?'  
  
I can't take this anymore. I was barely able to cope with the noise of their conversation, but this question.I don't want to be confronted with it.  
  
I get up, ready to leave. In my hurry I forgot I was holding coffee. Now I spilled it on my clothes. I feel the hot liquid on my skin. Normally I would have cursed or something, now I just don't care enough.  
  
I start moving, faster and faster. I just have to get out of here. Eventually I'm almost running, I really need some fresh air. A nurse apparently thinks I'm moving to fast and gets in my way, trying to stop me. But when I get close she moves aside, letting me pass. I must look like hell.  
  
Outside I stop, out of breath. Suddenly I am not able to stand on my feet anymore. Only now I notice how tired I really am.  
  
I sit on a bench, trying to calm down. I notice I still have a half full carton with coffee in my hands. Remembering what happened moments before makes me look at my clothes. I spilled quite a lot, my shirt is ruined.  
  
My mind goes over today's events for about the thousand time. I remember that I was about to say something to her, and her asking me about that in the ambulance. Truth is, I don't know what I was about to say. I know what I felt, the fear, friendship and maybe even love, but my thoughts were so complex I probably wouldn't be able to capture them in words.  
  
But I meant what I told her at the ambulance. I don't want to break in replacement.  
  
I wasn't so sure about that before. I never felt the need for a partner, and certainly not for a stubborn rookie female police detective who had left me handcuffed along the road because I had been speeding. But now I am glad I have a partner, and that this partner is Cameron Westlake. She is equal to me, able to keep up with me. And although I'll never admit it to anyone, I think that's good for me.  
  
And now she might die.  
  
She must live. I would take her place if I could. But I can't. And that makes me feel scared and confused. But more than this, I feel helpless.  
  
And if there is something I can't take, it is that feeling. I am a person who wants to deal with problems, solve them. But I can't do anything now.  
  
The only thing I can do is wait. 


End file.
